the simplest thing is most charitable

i never thought what life could be

to have someone

and someone have me.

i never thought it was possible to feel

the joy and happiness

of something real.

i never thought i would have to experience

the pain

the feeling of having everything.

but without you

i feel so confused.

as the days roll on

and i have no certainty.

for...

i wait to feel the buzzing

to read a message that comes from your mind.

and sometimes i chuckle at the make-believe words we make,

but all the same,

it places a smile upon my face,

and...

i wish i could hear your voice

that rings with calmness and poise:

to hear you say "have a good day; i'll talk to you later; good bye"

leaves butterflies in my stomach.

it jumps

it leaps

knowing you're there.

the kindest, smallest hello i hear from you

is the greatest thing i treasure most

along with a hug

(and sometimes), followed by a kiss.

but now that you're gone,

there is no happiness that rings though my body

no joy

no light of hope.

and pours out in place of joy is now

bitterness and sorrow

i fight back the tears, with deep contemplation

and there is an utterance that i wish to say most, which is

i miss you

&

i love you

and wish to be in your arms

for you give me

comfort & security for

you were once mine

and now, we are apart, moving on.

FRIENDSHIPS = complicated?

Friendships are complicated.

Friendships can be complicated.

Friendships, shouldn't be either of these things.

I guess friendships are like relationships, it takes just as much work sometimes.

Depending on how much you really care.

who would've of thought?

You would think that a friendship would

be better than a relationship.

In hopes that they understand you

&

are there for you;

regardless.

Thick & Thin.

Rough times, and Fun times.

No breaking up.

Drama overpasses.

(yeah, I guess you can say that's what a relationship is too)

so what is the difference, really?

Love the word, Reflection.

reflection: (1) throwing back by a body or surface of light, heat or sound without absorbing it (2) serious thought or consideration

(1) reflection. critical moments. judgement. fatal flaws. mistakes.

(2) reflection. growth. development. corrections. learning.

Tonight, I should be working on my paper, but here I am, wasting time...all thanks to my friend, who was digging into the past & reevaluating the things we once wrote. Electronic pages of our words, documented, by our fingers pressing down on keys, letters, that for words. Documentation for our own personal growth and development.

Love the word, reflection.

It Hit Me

This battle that I've been struggling with has finally revealed itself to me. It finally unraveled and I know what I have to do.

I need to focused on the actions that I take in my life. Not that I haven't done so already, but really grasp it. I mean yeah, I'm able to follow it out and all, but it's more than simply a given.

the ah-ha moment has arrived.

Temporary Happiness

We live our daily lives based off the pleasures of temporary happiness.  Do you beg to differ?  Let me explain to you how this works.  As human beings, we go through a variety of emotions.  At times we are angry, and other times disappointed, frustrated, and although these feelings can also be temporary, it often tends to last a hell of a lot longer than the feeling of being satisfied and happy.

For the most part, we go through our day contempt with the way things are turning out.  We don't fixate so much on the positive things in our lives, but rather the things that troubles us.

So what makes anger, disappointment, frustration and all the things that troubles us stay around longer?  It is the constant worry of not knowing the unexpected, which is why we choose to dwell upon this for so long.

And when something good comes along, then we take it for granted, or become satisfied for just a brief moment in time.  It is not long before the happy feeling runs out, and  before you know it, we return to our everyday normal lives, awaiting for the next great thing that will venture into our life and bring happiness again; but not fixated on when it will happen.

The Dark Knight

First of all, let me just say that this was one of the best movies that I have seen in a while! I would see it again. I came out, left in awe and wanting more.

Secondly, there is so much symbolism and messages, without even trying to look for it. Basically self explanatory, for those who heard it and applied what the characters were saying to today's life.  I like analyzing movies and what's being said.  It makes things interesting. 

But for those of you who haven't watched it yet, I will say no more, for now. Maybe more, later?

the Outcome of Customer Satisfaction, overcome

*I started this post earlier, but I didn't finish it, and then something came up, so I just added it. 

I got to the point where I gave up and stopped caring.  I became really moody, and when it came down to customers, I stopped trying to make conversations with them.  I stopped being pleasant and went into robot mode and going through the motions: saying "next in line", scanning the items, and placing the receipt in the bag.  From those angry customers, I became bitter because I had to deal with them and their problem with the store because they can't get their way. I think people need to learn how to read.  Seriously. No Joke. 

We as employees try our hardest to place and keep our items on the shelves, in an orderly manner.  But it's hard; things get misplaced.  Why can't people understand that?

But yesterday (7/22/08) A lady came, purchasing flowers, but apparently she forgot her credit card, so we had to ring up the flowers carefully.  Anyways, she found that she had returns in her car and wanted to bring them back in, but she ended up not coming back into the store until around 7:00 pm.  When she came back in she had a bundle load, and as I was ringing her up, she asked me what my manager's name was because she wanted to tell him that I made her feel welcomed at Michaels, unlike the other one she encountered.  Plus, she said that I was very "patient" which is something that I've been asking God to guide me in finding.  And although God has answered this prayer already, she was like the final closing statement, telling me that, yes I have mastered patience, and this is your reward.

I overcame the huge doubts I had about people's actions.  Now, even though people continue to do the things we do, I live life a lot happier knowing that I have made a difference in someone's life for one day.

note: previous week = worse week ever. got yelled at by manager (b/c he though I wasn't being productive) & dealt with long lines and frustration b/c I was the only cashier working. (the quick version)